43 Comments
User's avatar
William Pauley III's avatar

Totally unhinged! God, I hope you write a fuck ton of stories before they lock you up for good.

Expand full comment
Drew Valdez's avatar

I aim to please! Or displease. Depends on your taste in fiction 🍻

Expand full comment
William Pauley III's avatar

That's 267 for me.

Expand full comment
Drew Valdez's avatar

*takes out pen.

Writes 267 O’Douls for my friend William.

*clicks pen closed.

Expand full comment
William Pauley III's avatar

O'Douls works. I'll just take shots of Listerine between each bottle.

Expand full comment
Keith Long's avatar

This one is insane and ridiculous but there’s also such great writing present — the characters of Priest and Cinnamon, their relationship, the whole atmosphere of this truck stop place. Really great

Expand full comment
Drew Valdez's avatar

I’m glad you liked it! Thank you for giving it a proof before it posted. I’m almost to your story! I’m like halfway through the prompts. Had to stop to eat 😂

Expand full comment
Evelyn K. Brunswick's avatar

I just want to see this turned into a movie. Someone should ask Tarantino. Superb!

Expand full comment
Drew Valdez's avatar

I’d sell the rights pretty cheap if they let me voice little priest! I literally did the voice while typing 😂

Expand full comment
Ken Flyingheart's avatar

Man. You had me laughing and recoiling. Masterful.

Expand full comment
Drew Valdez's avatar

I’m glad you enjoyed it! Your take on Legos was a blast to read. It was awesome to see you take something so neutral and make it terrifying

Expand full comment
Ken Flyingheart's avatar

Oh thanks! I was stuck for a while on the prompt, scrapped like four different ideas. I gotta say, though. I keep thinking about this story, it's such a great read. And like Nick, I think this could be a movie.

Expand full comment
EJ Trask's avatar

drew this is a gem. total insanity. I loved it

Expand full comment
Drew Valdez's avatar

I’m glad you liked it!!! This prompt was a blast. I’m slowly working my way through them all

Expand full comment
Jared Lambert's avatar

I read, I laughed, I yelled, "Jesus Christ"—a lot.

A sincere thank you for creating this masterpiece!

Expand full comment
Drew Valdez's avatar

Bro thank you for standing ten toes down on the chihuahua idea. GOLD!!! I’m glad you liked this one! It was a blast to write

Expand full comment
Edward.Marlo.Ruiz's avatar

See you in hell DICKHEAD.

Still a fun ass read homie, you killed this one

Expand full comment
Drew Valdez's avatar

I’m glad you enjoyed it broski! I loved yours too. Thank you for all the help and I can’t wait to collab on something cool

Expand full comment
Edward.Marlo.Ruiz's avatar

Yo I’m too down! Lmk for real

Expand full comment
Unsympathetic Nervous System's avatar

Bizarre. Bloody. Strange. Unsertling. 10/10 stars

Expand full comment
Drew Valdez's avatar

Thank you so much! I’m glad you enjoyed it

Expand full comment
Katharine Kapodistria's avatar

Woah. Disgusting. Hilarious. Definitely scary. Unfortunately, my youngest daughter's current favourite song is 'Jolene' and this has totally ruined it for me forever!

Expand full comment
Drew Valdez's avatar

Dolly holds a special place in my heart and I’ve always wanted to incorporate her into a story. I think she’d be proud!!! Thank you for the read and I can’t wait to make you laugh and dry heave in the future!!!!

Expand full comment
Katharine Kapodistria's avatar

I look forward to it 😂

Expand full comment
A. C. Sanders's avatar

💀 I am dying. One of the most funny grotesque things I have ever read. Kudos for originality. 🤣

Expand full comment
Sean Thomas McDonnell's avatar

Um, what did I just read. keep em' comin'! haha

Expand full comment
Drew Valdez's avatar

I’m glad you liked it Sean! Means a lot. It was a blast to be able to show out with all the homies

Expand full comment
Saint-Lazare's avatar

I don't know what it says about me, but I need a movie adaptation of this masterpiece.

Expand full comment
Drew Valdez's avatar

As long as they let me voice Little Priest I’m happy!

Expand full comment
Tom Schecter's avatar

Fuuuuck I loved and hated this so much hahaha

Expand full comment
Drew Valdez's avatar

I’m glad! The goal was to be gross BUT approachable. A fun little ode to body horror for everyone.

Expand full comment
holl's avatar

Disgusting, hilarious, and horrific. I love it!

Expand full comment
Drew Valdez's avatar

I’m glad you liked it!!!! Thank you for the read

Expand full comment
Nick Winney's avatar

YOU HORRIBLE....HORRIBLE MAN!

I really had a struggle getting over the initial dick ripping scene... but thankfully (wtf do i mean....thankfully???) you turned it into gonzo gore with a thick slab of humour rather than the body horror that even i cant stomach. delightful gleeful ludicrous blood drenched insanity.

There is a C list film in this along the lines of zombeaver or sharknado or the classic basket case...would be an instant cult classic.

well done sire

Expand full comment
Drew Valdez's avatar

Little Priest was based off Basket Case. I was watching the movie when I reached out to Garen and the rest is history. I wanted to write something that was true to my body horror roots, but approachable with some laughs.

Expand full comment
Nick Winney's avatar

yay! a tisket a tasket...what's in the basket! you caught that vibe totally!

Expand full comment
Ashley T.K.'s avatar

I love this one so much — Absolutely worth re-reading! Not sure how many re-reads I can handle, though

Expand full comment
Drew Valdez's avatar

😂 One day I’m going to make “I survived this book” stickers and I promise to mail some to your doorstep.

Expand full comment